


Even Evil Men Have a Hobbies

by Jelfia



Series: Hobbies and Helicarriers [1]
Category: Marvel (Movies), Marvel Cinematic Universe, The Avengers (Marvel Movies), The Avengers (Marvel) - All Media Types
Genre: Gen
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2014-01-20
Updated: 2014-01-20
Packaged: 2018-01-09 09:01:00
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,592
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1144089
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Jelfia/pseuds/Jelfia
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Clint Barton and Natasha Romanoff are Shield's top assassins, see some of the mission they have gone on. The mission where they used the targets hobbies against them. Because even evil men (and women) have hobbies.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. The Convention

Even Evil Men Have a Hobbies.

 

The man sitting at the table calmly shuffling cards while watching the crowed was known by many names: Clint Barton, Hawkeye, That Damn Agent,  currently he was Jimmy  Hawkins;  a thirty two year old booking clerk and  gamer geek.

Clint watch from the corner of his eye as  a man dressed in jeans and a teeshirt saw him,  then lean down to whisper in a woman's ear. Her head whipped around, her face lit up and she made a beeline for Clint dragging  the man with her.

“Sir, sorry to bother you, but your costume is wicked awesome,  can I get a picture with you.”   The woman asked  eagerly, her husband (Clint  saw the matching rings on there hands.) rolled his eyes and sighed good naturedly.

Clint smiled and stood up  next  the woman  caucking his head so the hood  covered his eyes, his arms crossing in front of his chest  two plastic toy assassin blades shooting up from the gauntlets  on his arms.

“Shiny, thouse are better than mine. Did you buy them or make them?” the woman asked trying to get a better look at  his gauntlets.   Her own Assassin  outfit looked more  like a  Late Victorian era to his Italian  Renaissance era.

“I have some friends that made them for me.”  Clint chuckled  as she held her own hand down and out.   Her husband snapped the picture and then dragged her off before she would bother Clint any more  as she attempted to recreate his gauntlet mechanism in her head.  Clint sat back  down and  went back to watching the crowed chuckling under his breath at some of the other peoples costumes.  He smiled as his partner sprawled in the chair across from him. She was  also known by many names,  Natasha Romanoff, The Black Widow, the Scary Half of Strike Team Delta, or as she was currently known Virginia  Alianovna; twenty eight year old nurse,  and superhero geek. She was dress up as... herself. The only difference  in her ‘workday’ outfit and her ‘con’ outfit was the con one had cheap plastic guns stuck in the holster. (Ops went ballistic when they realized that their two assassins were ‘fitting in’ at the convention  by going as assassins.)

Clint held up the cards “egyptian rat or durak?”

“Durak.” She replied winking at  a group of males, who looked to be about fifteen, that were elbowing each towards her.  Clint dealt out the hands and the two got down to playing the card game. Seeming to ignore everything around them.

“ _You deliver the gift_?”  Clint asked quietly in russian.  She nodded as she played a card down smiling viciously.

“I win.”  She pursed her lips “The booth in the far left corner has Captain America issues number 132,  and you can get the artist  to sign it at two thirty.”  raised her eyebrow at Clint.

“Seem a lot  for only losing one hand. I’ll get it for you this time,  since I missed your birthday.” Clint replied working in the code for  understanding the new intel that was providing.  Natasha waved him off then started dealing herself a solitary game.

Clint made his way first to pick up the comic then to the table to have it signed.  The target was gushing to the artist and had a stack of comic to get signed.  Clint carefully twisted the ring the way R and D had shown him to pop out the tiny needle,  he ‘tripped’ bumping into the target  catching the guy by the arm to keep him from falling over.  

“Sorry,”  Clint released the guy  who eyed Clint warily as his bodyguards moved forward.  Clint eyed the bodyguards and backed up “Sorry, s..sorry the boots are a little big I keep tripping in them.” He blurted out. The Target turned back to the artist and  picked up his comic and stalked out.  

Clint stepped forward “My friend had to work today and couldn’t come, can you sign it to Phil? He is a huge fan of your work and of Captain America.”

“Sure .” Replied the artist his voice gravelly with age, he handing back the comic “There you go.” Clint  nodded his thanks and headed out, Natasha falling in step next to him.

“I should have had him sign it to Steve instead, on second thought it would have been odd.”

“Brat.*” She muttered.

“I never can tell are you saying brother in russian or brat in america?”

“Khuy tebe!*” She replied as they passed an ambulance pulling into the convention center parking lot.

 

Mission 1728-ELI-6:  Eliminat - Completed - Successful   (see attached after action reports 16.a)

Classified: level 6

Target: Dante Acevedo (attached images files 23.pic 1 thru 78, intel document forms 135.g, 27.c, 52, and 62.a3.)

Time Frame: P3,  multiple possible location for target takedown.

Reason: Drug Trafficking (attached form 82.HYDRA), Weapon Trafficking (attached form 82.AIM  and 82.HYDRA),  Human trafficking, (attached form 82.HYDRA)

Assigned to: Strike Team Delta,  Agent Sitwell, handler.

Intel Notes: Target too paranoid for a sniper kill, only time gaurd is loosened is once Target  is inside if a comic convention or his home, used Targets convention attending hobby as a way to get in close to Target, to used a dual chemical poison that simulating an aneurysm.

After Action notes:

**Clean kill.  No collateral damaged. -Sitwell**

LOVE THIS MISSION!!!! Suggest  a mission to COMICON next!- Barton

p.s. I take back all the mean things i have said about Intel.

_Mission completed efficiently. - Romanoff_

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> *Brat - look it up in google translate. type brother in english and translated to russian, then click on the audio listen. :)  
> *Khuy tebe! - basically fuck you.  
> I apologized for my russian, it is google translate and youswear .com website.  
> please note I spelt both phonickly with english letters.


	2. Camping

Clint raced around the Jeep opening her door he held out a hand to help Natasha down. She gave him a quick peck on the cheek as  she stepped out of the car.   Clint reached  down and pulled out  a green hiking  bag he easily tossed on his shoulders.

“So Mrs. Rasmusson which trail should we take?” Clint asked wrapping an arm around Tasha’s waist. She stood looking down at her small paper map then up at the big trail map. They both glanced over as two men and a woman came down the trail. The woman smiled at them then helped unhook the bicycles from the tree.

“This one seem the best one.” Tasha smiled up at Clint and pointed at one.

“Excellent choice, I will make an outdoors woman out of you yet!” Clint laughed as they  started up the hill. They heard chuckles from the bicyclist as they left.

 

The two “newlyweds” hiked up and around the trail.  When they got to the top of the small mountain (some might call a big hill)  and  had a great  view of the valley Clint nudged Tasha and pointed his chin down  animal game  trail that followed the ridge away from the marked human trail. Tasha nodded and let him lead. Neither spoke a word as they hiked till they would not be seen from the human trail. Clint kneeled down and  pulled out a case from his hiking bag and quickly put together his sniper rifle. He then  glared down at the slate before carefully lying prone on the ground.  He wiggled slightly before looking down the sight. Tasha pulled out a pair of binoculars  the two sat quietly  waiting for the  target.

An older lady,  athlete with a hint of motherly curves to her body. Her white hair pinned back in a bun. She waved to the kids at one of the campsites  as she made her way to her own tent.

“Target spotted, one o’clock at noted campsite. Confirm.” Clint stated quietly, his voice  not even disturbing the birds  nearby.

“Confirm, one o’clock, still green.” Tasha replied in the same tone.   Nothing happened  Tasha glanced over at Clint,

“Hawkeye, take out the target.” She stated.

“There are kids two campsites down what if they see?” Clint asked his voice slightly forlorn.

“And what do we tell the parents of the kids that will disappear in a week when the Target send her mercenaries to the nearest towns.  That’s over a thousand children, not counting the parents that don’t get knocked out with the gas, Clint do it.”

There was a quiet pop from the sniper rifle.

“Call it in Tasha.” Clint sat up and  started breaking apart his gun.  Tasha patted him on the back  and called Sitwell.

“I need a vacation.”  Clint murmured picking up his  pack.

“Sitwell will notify the cops when we are out of the park. To check her tent.” Tasha murmured  as she dredging up happy go luck newlywed face.

Clint smiled slightly. “Grazie, sei il migliore.*”

  
  


Mission 352a27-ELI-6: Eliminated - Completed - Successful  (see attached after action reports 16.a)

Classified: level 6

Target:Lisa Harriet Warner

(attached images files 352a27.pic 1 thru 327, intel document forms 135.g, 8C5, 27.c, and 62.a3.)

Time Frame:  ASAP-P1 current location known. Less than two weeks left at current location.

Reason:Human trafficking, (attached form 82.FRLANCE)

Drug Trafficking (attached form 82.Trask),  

Assigned to: Strike Team Delta, Primary Target.  Squad Alpha and Gamma secondary target, Warner’s mercenaries. Agent Sitwell, handler, secondary handler of Squad Alpha and Gamma.

Intel Notes: Target spends time camping then a month later all children in any and all nearby towns disappear.  Squad Alpha and Gamma are ready to take out Ms. Warner’s mercenary. Ms. Warner must be taking out first.  Suggest  taking her out while she is camping. See attached file 8C5  of current location.

After Action Notes:  

**Clean kill. Confirmed no  witness.   -Sitwell**

Target neutralized - Barton

_Mission completed, efficiently. - Romanoff_

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Italian = “Thanks, you’re the best.”


End file.
